Ted Hankey the Christmas Poo (and his tattoo)

Yesterday, flabby bald darts cunt, Ted Hankey, got knocked out of the BDO semi-finals, complaining about the air conditioning. Well he should try playing a game in our office then. Although I doubt he would; he'd only start complaining about the laminated flooring, or the poofy wallpaper in the gents' toilets or something. And the four flights of stairs would kill him for sure. We do have a darts board though. After the defeat, he announced his departure from the BDO, which undoubtedly means he'll be swapping leagues and playing for Barry Hearn's PDC next season. "The Count" would then have the opportunity to change his nickname, possibly to "Mr Hankey the Christmas Poo", or simply, "The Cunt". Having a look through Google Analytics yesterday, I noticed that someone had found this blog from searching on The Sun's Website for "Ted Hankey Tattoo": Tom Fogarty - Darts Roundup Well, I hope they like what they found! Here's a picture of Ted Hankey getting a tattoo, which can be found here. It's a tattoo of the Bride of Dracula, which he got at Pyscho Tattoos in Kinmel Bay. A classy tattoo for a classy bloke. Imaginatively, the article is called "Darts champion Ted Hankey gets tattoo in Kinmel Bay", so it's a very rare combination where you get to see high quality journalism, sublime art, and top-notch sport - all rolled in to one. Hopefully someone will find this website via The Sun website again soon, this time searching for "flabby bald darts cunt Ted Hankey".

Tom’s Darts Roundup

As the Grand Slam of darts is on ITV4 this week, I thought I'd do a quick roundup. Not of the tournament results mind you, but of my favourite darts players. The best thing about darts is the pub stereotypes who play it:     Steve "The Adonis" Beaton Got his nickname because he is an Adonis. Apparently there is no irony intended in the nickname. Brian "Pecker" Woods Has the best website of all the darts players. Ever. http://www.brianpeckerwoods.co.uk "The Count" Ted Hankey Got his nickname because he looks just like Dracula (at a glance). One letter away from being an accurate nickname. Mervyn "The King" King Moody bastard. Balances his time between playing darts, drinking pints and governing the Bank of England. "Wolfie" Martin Adams Looks like a werewolf. Like to wear gold. Cackles a lot (after his own jokes). Andy "The Viking" Fordham Not from Denmark, Norway or Sweden, but does like pub food.