Dating Porn Stars

I don’t want to sound like some really heavy, negative-vibe merchant, but this week hasn’t been a good one. I’m glad to say, though, that this is not the case for everyone.

There’s this cool bloke at work who does our journalism and reporting. I say he’s cool, because he’s got big hair, he’s smoked a few doobies laced with opium and he lives in Bethnal Green (officially the coolest area in London). And what makes him even cooler, is that he’s going out on a date with a porn star tonight called Scarlet O’Whora.

If you Google her, the very first hit will say “Scarlet O’Whora takes a Black Cock inside her Asshole“. Nice!

Anyway, I’m not going to mention the journalist’s name – just in case any future prospective employers Google his name and find him associated with somebody called Scarlet O’Whora. Or worse still, associated with me. Nevertheless, I salute you, Sir.

I wonder if she’s got any friends in the business you’d go out with me? I’m going to ask him in the morning…

In other news, I bought a massive porkpie for £1.25 in Iceland. It really is massive. And it has to be eaten by 22nd of January. I see no problems there.

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This is a personal website and the views expressed here are my own (or stolen from other people down the pub). Facts may not be accurate, or could be poorly paraphrased gags borrowed from proper writers - or simply, outright lies.
#jokingnotjoking