5 Minutes In The Life of An Idiot

Decided to have a bath in the afternoon yesterday – I’m on annual leave – and why not?

I got into the bath and sat down, then realised I left the soap in the other room by the basin. Idiot!

Frustrated, I stood up then dropped my only towel in the bath – completely soaked through. Idiot!

I got out and did a strange tip-toe hop into the other room to get the soap. I looked a bit like the child chatcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang (only without a net and naked). I then slipped on the wet bathroom floor, skidded and hit my head on the toilet. Idiot!

Stepped back into the bath, but before sitting down I spotted that I’d forgot to to close the curtain; the Nigerian man in the estate next door was standing there looking at me – with a clear view of my cock. Idiot!

I sat down, humiliated, and pretended that none of this just happened. I then notice that I also forgot my flannel. I’ll be 30 in a matter of weeks. And I am an idiot.

The end.