List Mania 9: Things To Do in Camberwell When You’re Skint

I’m desperately trying to save money for my holiday at the moment, but this is so hard to do when living in such an expensive city as London. Based on the book 36 Reasons To Love Camberwell, here is my guide to living cheaply and having fun in Camberwell:

1. Have a wank
2. Make friends with your neighbour’s cat
3. Go and sit at Camberwell Green and laugh and shout at the buses as they go past
4. Do a home tattoo on yourself, then walk to King’s College Hospital when you catch septicemia
5. Go to the library and deliberately piss yourself
6. Scrunch up some Xmas wrapping paper on your head and visit the gospel church on a Sunday morning. Don’t forget to sing as loud as you can!
7. Sneak into the Maudsley Mental Hospital and try to fit in
8. Go to Burgess Park and sleep on a bench
9. Go to the women’s yoga class and super glue yourself to the window outside
10. Visit the bottle bank in Morrison’s car park and sniff the empties
11. Have another wank

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